December 29, 2006

Pray to Dog

Should I start dating again? Or spend more time with Dog?

I couldn't decide, so I started making a list:

Dogs vs Women?

Dogs don't cry
Dogs love it when your friends come over
Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo
Dogs think you sing great
A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink
Dogs don't expect you to call when you're running late. The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you
Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs
Dogs don't notice if you call them another dog's name
Dogs are excited by rough play
Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away
Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair
Anyone can get a good looking dog
If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it
Dogs don't shop
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor
Dogs never need to examine the relationship
A dog's parents never visit
Dogs love long car trips
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions
Dogs like beer
Dogs don't hate their bodies
Dogs never criticize
Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across
Dogs never expect gifts
Dogs don't worry about germs
Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you've had
Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives
You never have to wait for a dog, they're ready to go 24 hours a day
Dogs have no use for flowers, cards or jewelry
Dogs don't borrow your shirts
Dogs never want foot rubs
Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public
Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk
Dogs can't talk
Dogs seldom outlive you


Blueberry said...

That picture is soooo cute.
... and I think the choice is clear! heh heh... better yet, start dating a woman who loves dogs.

niCk (Mem Beth) said...

**big sigh** -

yeah, easy decision. But on the other hand, women do make life more ...... interesting

Pam said...

Clearly, you were dating the wrong women!!

angry ballerina said...

Dogs don't nag

Blueberry said...

One defense of women I would make is that they usually have fresher breath than dogs.


fallenmonk said...

Why not do both?

Evil Spock said...

"Why not do both?"

Too frikkin' easy . . .

BBC said...

Sure Nick, you should start dating again. But as a wise old man told me (something I keep forgetting), you should only date widow ladies that enjoyed being married and are willing to try it again.

Other than that, just stick with your dog and enjoy life without the insane chicks that drive you up the walls. Enjoy them, but at a distance.

Women aren't very flexible anymore, but they expect you to be. Hey, do what you like, I don't have to live with it. :-)

pissed off patricia said...

Dogs Rule! Unless of course there's a cat in the house.

How about finding a lady who adores dogs? I found a gentleman who adores all living creatures. That's as good as it gets. :)

Anonymous said...

Dating? Why not just try "Friends With Benefits"? No need for chit-chat or any of that other crap that goes along with dating. Just "benefits" - you know. :-)

Anonymous said...


I'll stick to my dogs.. ;-) and gay men.. ;-)

Yeah.. I'm back... ;-)


Gracie said...

Oooh Keeee Doe Keee!

Jumping in late but it's a little hard to ignore that list, yikes.

fallenmonk asks, "Why not enjoy both?

I agree