September 1, 2006


I'm having trouble collected my thoughts today and putting them to blog. So I just give up and give you humor.

Things That Are "Difficult" to Say When You're Drunk.

Things That Are "Difficult" to Say When You're Drunk:

Things That Are "Very Difficult" to Say When You're Drunk:
"Cogito ergo sum."
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder

Things That Are "Downright Impossible" to Say When You're Drunk:
Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
Nope, no more booze for me!
Sorry, but you're not really my type.
Good evening, Officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight.
Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing!

A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, rocks about 2" in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full? They agreed that it was.So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed that this time it was.The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous -- yes.The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour their entire contents into the jar ! -- effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed."Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your children--things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.""If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for thethings that are important to you.Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing.! There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the car. "Take care of the rocks first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers."

Do you remember your first beer?


cyndy lu who said...

Interesting selection of words. The term, Passive Agressive Disorder is particularly interesting, somehow. People who continually provoke others and then habitually play the victim and/or aggressor when they get the attention they begged for. Apparently a small percentage of the men with this disorder are actually considered schizophrenic. I read that close friendship with those suffering from this disorder is impossible, and that they can never be happily married.

And I always wondered about those with families who spend hours and hours a day online. Their loved ones must miss them a great deal, I imagine. What's the point of doing charity work for strangers if your own family is neglected?

Oh yeah, and I don't drink. ;) That's why if I were a guy, I would never end up marrying a woman who looks like a man with a wig on, unless of course that was my type. LOL!

Well, off to paint my house now! :P I think I know somebody who would like to help me paint it, too. :D

cyndy lu who said...

Sorry about the typos. ;)

niCk (Mem Beth) said...

cyndy, out of all terms, you focus on Passive Aggressive Disorder? Do you know me? I'm not being cynical here, I have been told by people who knew me well that I'm like that, and I can't say their wrong.

I can't say I drink, but I do like to have an occasional beer, a real beer, not the watered down American "Light" Beers" that are just made for college boys to get drunk on.

HHMM everyone is off painting houses, I must be missing somehting fun.

cyndy lu who said...

Okay-- I focused on it because it struck a nerve in my experiences with you. Thing is, folks who are mental with everyone else, tend to get on well with me because I am a touch empathic. The down side is it's a challenge to maintain my boundaries. But I can't get near someone online enough to do any good. :) I am only beginning to acclimatize to this kind of virtual communication after several years because when I first got online and began to interact, it was a torturous flood of information. Imagine literally drowning in gazillions of people's emotions all at once. Get it– not thoughts, but emotions. Maybe you think I am mad for saying it, but either you believe in that sort of thing or you don't.

And since we're on the subject, when I do drink, I like to have organic wine or beer. The real stuff, of course. :) Here's an imaginary toast to idiosyncratic people. Clink!

cyndy lu who said...

I bet you're cute, too. :P LOL!

Anonymous said...

You don't really like Indians too much do you. ;) Imagine you died in two years? That would be terrible. :)

Minou said...

I just thought I would say "Good evening, occifer, ishn't it luvverly out tonite . . ".

Cul sec!