September 19, 2006

Go Jump in a Lake!

Don't Read This. It's Crazy. Please skip today's post.

I have voice in my head telling me that I need to get a message to all the people of the Jewish (Judeo), Christian, and Islamic faiths. I don't usually do what the voices in my head tell me to do, but this one is different, it won't go away until I have finished sending this message. I have asked the voice if this is G-D, but it just gives me riddles when I ask, so don't ask me. I also get this sharp pain in the groin every time I question the voice, so I'm not asking anymore.

THE MESSAGE:
A revelation is coming. There is one way for everyone on the planet to be saved. You must ask for forgiveness, then be ceremoniously cleansed of your transgressions against humanity and nature. The coming years will consist of torture and despair on this planet. In order for you to be saved, this is what you'll have to do:

After you have asked to be forgiven, find the nearest body of water, and submerge yourself, all the way. Don't hold your breath, breath in the water, its time to come home. If you don't have a body of water close by, then use any method you can to achieve this baptismal. Fill a tub with water. You need to be completed submerged. If you have to travel to get to the water, then start out now.

I told you this was crazy. You would have to be insane to listen to a voice in my head. I told the voice that it was cruel, and the voice said no it wasn't; "If they truly believe, they have no reason to fear. The water will make the journey a very pleasant, peaceful journey."

I am a skeptic. There is no reason to believe me or a voice in my head. If you read my blog, you know that I think religious conformity is irrational and unnatural. It is my opinion religions that were developed from the Bibles based on Moses' writings of the word of G-d are just following ancient folklore and myths that religious leaders have misinterpreted and abused for their own personal reasons. But I also believe that every one should follow their own heart, so if those religions make sense to you, that is okay by me, as long as you don't try to force your beliefs on others.

The last thing the voice said to me: "Open your heart and mind to see G-d differently and more truthfully and you will see no fear, no punishment, no judgments, no conditions for love, no requirements of sacrifice, no blaming with sin and no threats of any kind. You will see pure love, pure peace, pure kindness and a solid desire to do all that is necessary to help us undo what we have done to ourselves. Just say, "I choose to see more clearly.", and your path to seeing and experiencing unbiased truths will begin."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

smile - so good

i belive also about all modern day religions

think - we had several religions that respected mother earth and all creatures on it -- oh yea, that's what the crusades were all about - killing everyone who did not believe

jesus was a blessing and a curse...

if you think about what he said - he is a true good person

if you think about what they did with him afterwards...i personally wonder if it wouldn't have been better for him to have never been born

Unknown said...

I so agree with your comment on JC - if he was as powerful as he was made out to be surely he would have seen how people would twist his words, misrepresent him and fight wars because of it. What was he thinking of?

Anonymous said...

I am the voice in your head. But only one of them. Tripple up on your filters. Keep working it out Nick.

Right, like I'm powerful. Your fucking stupid ancestors fucked their minds up and it still is around today.

Jesus wasn't a curse, the fucking idiots that wrote about him was.